Don’t Leave

Don’t Leave

Don’t Leave

Don’t leave
Because you  hate your family
Don’t leave
Because the brainwashing of
Relationship attachments you are born with
Will haunt you forever

Don’t leave in anger
You will ruin my life and yours
The obligations you and I will carry
on our backs
We cant get rid of
We wouldn’t be able to carry
Don’t leave in retaliation
Of one request you truly wanted for life
And they  had refused

Leave only truly
Because you love me
Without obligations

Don’t leave
To break the chains
You are tied down with
Of your culture or traditions
Leave to build a life of us

If you ever leave
For all the reasons I don’t want you to
For your sudden surreal judgement cloudiness
I will be the victim of the trap. Not
Love that I so innately
Believed to make me grow

You only know the love that
That makes one a hostage
Of obligations and incarcerate
Them into oblivions of nonpayments
You would take your lifetime
To do to me
What was done on to you
Before you left
All your life
Thats all you will give
As that is all you knew

I died the day you left
Everyone for me
To be with me

So If I could ask you
One more time
Don’t Leave to come to me
Then Please Don’t!

But now I can only wish
I can only see my distant self
Empty, sitting with my head in my knees
Ready to leave
For the same reasons
You left
Your Everybody
I could only wish…

Sunday

Sunday

Sunday

Sun shines at 11:00am bright in the sky
Dark and white clouds minding away and fly
TV Channels  selling Jesus en mass
Some bluntly some with class

While I was watching (SNL) Saturday Night Life
Night walked into Sunday Morning without strife
Just after half an hour
I was frantically laughing with full SNL comedy power

My sight, wanders through my California blinds,
Withered and falling leaves of Lemon Tree, it finds
It’s way to the Neighbouring windows across the road
Without interest to pry my thoughts in my mind unload

How blessed I am to have good neighbours
The care we bestow upon each other and the fruits of loves labours
Agents knocking doors to put money in our pockets
These are selling times in real estate markets

The loss would be too great for the moneys never last
Should we move the neighbourhood sell home fast?
Where would me move to, in these  times, which cities?
But Sundays are not to think of such superficialities

Just relax and take a day off should be the only thought
No web searching to see the deals that are hot
No tablets or pads or talks of money, religion or politics
Do some book reading no mouse to scroll or new  clicks

 

 

 

Yellow

Yellow

Yellow

Don’t turn in your grave
You can’t, long ago you’ve become worm food
But your legendary Yellow Journalism
Is now the mainstream.

What is news now, but a medium to propagate
Fear, hate, violence, voyeurism,
Manipulation!
War, war and more wars.

Thanks for the ideology Pulitzer,
You single handedly contributed to
Making Yellow colour more bloody
Than the blood sheds of millions
Due to Yellow Propaganda

How many more prizes will be deemed
Highest …in your name
Follower Journalists,
Be proud
You Just won again
The medals of Blood and Death
Keep Assange out of the loop
For he couldn’t and will not
Serve your purpose

It’s like blaming
Einstein for Atomic Bomb Invention
Well then blame the whole humanity
Why do we even exist
Evolution couldn’t have created
Chaos any better.

Photograph by (onlybackground)

 

She said, “I am sinful”

She said, “I am sinful”

She said, “I am Sinful”

 

While planting garlic in my back yard this Monday, I had an unexpected blessed visitor. I am all covered in wet mud, stinking of fertilizer, but she does not care. So sweet of her. So I take a break made some hot Pakistani tea with milk and sugar for her. Some gluten free chocolate cake that I made the night before.  And she started telling me about her self that she has converted to christianity from a sect of Muslims and found Jesus as her saviour.

She said “I am sinful. If I don’t believe in Jesus because not believing in him is a sure damnation for me and I will become sinful.”

I  told her that I respect her beliefs. I have lived in Southern states of the USA and have actually participated in denominational and non denominational Christians practices. And in Pakistan I studied in a catholic school. I haven’t just read the several bibles but also practiced with them to have a better understanding of human faith and the behaviours that go with it.

For which she replied “Catholics are not Christians. In India all I knew was catholics and that Religion (not a christian sect) does not appeal to me at all. I believe int his orthodox christian way of finding Jesus…”
She was saying more but then I politely assertively interrupted her and asked her simple questions…

Me: “Why do you have to disrespect, in comparison, catholic faith for you to be a better believer in Jesus or as a matter of fact your birth religion?”

Her: “Because I believe that its the only way for salvation. What do you                    think?”

Me:  “Without disrespecting any religion. Without denying anyones belief or bashing them. Without blasphemy. I believe that I am not sinful. Accepting that I am sinful is setting myself up to do bad things and passing the blame on Not believing in an Entity. I believe I have Godly Powers. I believe that God has made me in God’s image just like everything and everyone. Since God is perfect, I believe everything that happens to me is by virtue of that belief. I stay humble to the plans and God’s intentions without questioning God. As a human being I also believe that should one day science happen to prove that GOD does not exist I wouldn’t feel betrayed or left out in anyway. I wouldn’t go bankrupt in my belief. I own my own accountabilities and actions and efforts of doing or not doing things. I love not because I want to be loved back but because this is what my belief is. However to be recognized os good for my soul It’s hard to be in this belief at all times. Just like it is hard to have a good night sleep and wake up fresh everyday. But then we take actions to keep belief as much constant as possible.”

Her: “I can’t believe that. Also, Ali I am so loud I think your neighbours would think that I am preaching at you.”

I smiled knowing how good my neighbours are and how truly blessed I am to have these neighbours.

Me: “then don’t. ” Politely, I reasserted. Then asked her softly  “Also, can you prove to me that you are here standing in my backyard saying all this? Can you convince me that you exist while I deny you on your face?” I explained Descartes to her  and told her the story of Cogito Ergo Sum.

Her silence and confusion and surrender was apparent. She can’t convince me that she does existed nor she can refute that she exists. I paraphrased Descartes without challenging her that Descartes said that the day anyone will truly believe in what they have just discussed regarding Jesus, would be the day you will never advertise Jesus in this way. In order to master ones faith one must believe in the existence of God as one believes in her own existence. I also emphasized that for me to believe in my belief I can’t compare other beliefs. Its my own personal belief and so is theirs. I can’t tell anyone who is right or wrong because I am only responsible for my rights and wrongs. Pointing out or bashing who is doing what is false pride. I am no judge of anyone even if I try I wouldn’t know if your belief is better or more than mine.

After she left I went back to my garlic planting. Hopefully next year I’ll have a whole years supply of fresh home grown garlic.

Worthy

WORTHY

I don’t know what my worth is, I never cared
Like Silent flowers, and short, tall trees,
Like buzzing bumbles and hovering honey bees
I never snared

I dwell among the nature free
Like raindrops and soothing, hugging breeze,
Like Falling leaves and snowy freeze
I never decree

I am forestry and wild habitants love and dream
Like wildlife animals harmony, and peaceful cohabitation
Like Flock of birds, herd of animals among the population
I never scheme

This is what, I am worthy, means to me
Not war or cruelty or supremacies
Not cut throat monstrous ceremonies
I am always in peace in love and carefree

I believe in simple things to  moderate
Like changing times and suave,humble dispositions
Like calming sea waves and gentle gestures compassions
I never stagnate

Acceptance

ACCEPTANCE

 

So tell me the truth
Truth about you
Not about me!
I accept, the truth about me
Will make me feel
You are insulting me

I feel degraded
I feel humiliated
I didn’t know
Hearing truth about myself
Makes me so upset
That I want to end it all

Just lie to me
Keep lying about me
Keep it coming
At least it is beautiful
At least it takes me away
To this La La Land
Of loving myself
And return the love to you

But then I asked you
To speak the truth
And Stupid you,
You really did

I panicked
I felt horrible
Disgusted
At myself

Am I this person
Am I this hideous?
Am I?
The earth shattered
I wanted to bury myself
Guilt, anger, disappointments

Why did I ask for the truth
Now I have to leave you
Be with someone else
Who will abuse me and lie to me
Everyday
I know he will
Because I know the truth now
He will, to my face
I will smile back and think,
What a crock of shit

I would want to run to you
But I am scared of your truth
I banish you
I severe ties with you
I am happy to not know the truth

The world is mine now
Acceptance of lies
Wins
I surrender to the lies
Liar, you live within me
Truth go fuck yourself!

Perhaps, Some Day!

Perhaps, Some Day!

No Religions,
No Economics
No Powers
No kings or queens or presidents
No governments
No Control,
No barbed wires
Nor soldiers
To defend anything
Or invade

John, I am dreamer too
Just like you

Perhaps,
the dark clouds of greed and opportune
will never cast away

Perhaps from this puddle of
Warepreneurs, scarcity creating mongers
Perhaps, Someday…
This puddle will bear
The plant with fruits of abundance
Fruits of Love and peace

Till then

I shall live
Hopefull
I shall keep dreaming

Till then

RIP victims
of these greedy bastards
Across the world
Everywhere

RIP
Past
Present and
Future victims

For these monstrosities,
Historically are timeless

But Perhaps, someday…